Temptress of a Thousand Faces English subs

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Warning!! Do not watch this movie unless you’re thoroughly inebriated. No hallucinogens necessary though, as the producers have provided those for you in the form of this celluloid mind-trip.

The Temptress of the title attempts to take over the world. Like any self-respecting unhinged megalomaniac, she lives in a palatial cave, protected by an army of ninja guys and a bevy of pistol toting female guards. Best of all, the cave’s hot tub quarter (every cave has one of these) is stocked with hotties in blue panty ensembles. What could be better? If this is what world domination is all about, take me to your leader!!

The intrepid and talented heroine of this girl-power yarn (sexy Tina Chin Fei) is good with a gun and adept at Kung Fu. Furthermore, she’s aided in her fight against evildoers by the cinematic tradition of inept henchmen. The ninja guys are not very good at ninja-ing, and the guards can’t shoot straight, adding proof to a time-worn complaint: You can’t get decent help these days. Along the way, the wicked Temptress assumes the identity of the heroine. This turns out to be an ingenious plot device, as we’re treated to some Tina vs. Tina escapades, including a wild nightie fight.

A lot of bodies pile up in this masterwork, but the mayhem has the dramatic intensity of a Kindergarten play. (There’s no mention of funeral services for the fallen extras). .

A highlight is the final scene. It’s intentionally funny, but it’s brazen political incorrectness actually makes it much funnier then it’s intended to be. Classic!

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